The Pursuit of Happiness
Earned, Grown, or Found?
This week I spent time thinking about something we all wrestle with from time to time: happiness. Is it something we have to work for? Something we grow from the inside out? Or something we stumble upon when we stop chasing the wrong things?
There’s no one-size-fits-all answer, but I’ve pulled together some powerful perspectives that might help you make sense of your own path.
When Happiness Is Something You Earn
Some voices out there argue that happiness isn’t something the world owes us—it’s something we earn. Not through luck, but through effort, discipline, and showing up consistently for ourselves.
That message can feel tough, but it’s also empowering. It reminds us that we’re not helpless. If we want a better life, we can build it—one decision, one action at a time.
When Happiness Is Something You Grow
Then there’s a softer but equally powerful truth: happiness starts inside.
In The Art of Happiness, the Dalai Lama and Dr. Howard Cutler explore how our mindset—compassion, patience, inner peace—plays a major role in how happy we feel. Even when life is messy, we can train our minds to find meaning and calm. It’s not about ignoring problems; it’s about changing how we carry them.
When Society Sends the Wrong Signals
Paul Dolan, a behavioral scientist, brings another perspective in Happy Ever After. He believes that many of us chase happiness in all the wrong places—not because we’re clueless, but because we’re taught to.
High-status jobs, marriage, material success—these things aren’t bad, but they might not be your personal recipe for happiness. Dolan encourages us to ask: Are you living your life, or someone else’s idea of it?
Questions To Consider
There’s no single formula for happiness. But here are a few questions you might want to sit with this week:
Are my daily actions lining up with what I really value?
Am I making choices from fear, or from faith in something better?
Who gets to define what a “good life” looks like for me?
The journey is personal—and it’s okay if it doesn’t look like anyone else’s.
Whether you’re building, growing, or discovering happiness right now—know this: it’s okay to be in progress. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You just have to keep moving with intention.
If You Want to Dig Deeper:
The Happiness Hypothesis by Jonathan Haidt
Build The Life You Want by Arthur C. Brooks and Oprah Winfrey
The Art of Happiness by the Dalai Lama & Howard Cutler
Happy Ever After by Paul Dolan